New Sailing Goals: It's Not About Winning but Welcoming
At 78 years old, my husband Captain Al and I reentered the local racing scene after several years, during which we felt we were too old to be on the racecourse. We had turned our sights more towards cruising even though we stayed members of the Havre de Grace Yacht Club (HDGYC), and we did our time as race committee.
But this past winter, as we were doing boat “things” up on the hard, the captain mentioned that maybe he’d like to race a bit. I was all in but curious about the change of heart. Fleeting time perhaps? A passion for the thrill that wasn’t being satisfied by cruising? FOMO—at least I can attest to the fact that I did suffer from the fear of missing out. This year, we actually showed up for the first Thursday night race ready to go. More about our season later. Reflecting on our story that goes way back, I am struck by the evolution in our sailing history.
I knew, or at least I should have known, that Al was keen on sailing when we took a Sunfish out on our honeymoon in the Adirondacks in 1967. I knew nothing, and he knew almost nothing—including how to get back to where we had launched the boat. Years went by, kids were born, jobs evolved, and we moved to the East Coast from Ohio in 1980. Being near water, Al found Other People’s Boats (OPB) he could sail on, and he did so as often as he could. He honed his skills until acquiring his 50-ton captain’s license and ASA teaching certificates. We started taking cruises to the British Virgin Islands in 1987, with our sons and me at first only knowing how to do a proper cleat hitch. The rest was on-the-job-training every couple of years.
Long story short, Al one day heard me utter the sentence all sailing spouses wish they could hear: “Honey, let’s buy a boat.”
Actually, what the spouse (I) had in mind was any old boat that could serve as a floating beach house. What the captain quickly latched onto was a new Dehler, a 36-foot performance cruiser that would serve both of our interests. That was in 2001. We joined the HDGYC and kept the boat at Tidewater Marina where the club was located.
Al had to urge me to “try just one race” on our boat, Summer Semester, which I tried to resist because I thought it would be stressful and I wasn’t a skilled sailor. Al prevailed. Before the first upwind mark of my first race, I asked him why that other boat was ahead of us. Bingo! My competitive nature was the impetus I needed to actually learn how to sail. And I had a husband as my instructor.
We combined racing and cruising for the next 17 years or so, racing every week with an occasional Bay race and even several Governor’s Cup Races where we proudly earned silver a few times. Our cruising was focused on the Chesapeake of course, but in 2010, we grabbed some extra crew members and headed north to New England—my first time sailing on the ocean, whereas Al had done three Bermuda races. We returned to New England four times, each time extending our trip until our longest one to Maine lasted six weeks. We have bareboat chartered in Turkey and Croatia with family and friends.
We went from non-spinnaker (NS) to spin racing after winning NS High Point honors for the Upper Bay in 2006; we never came close to that in the spin class. In 2008, we moved to Havre de Grace from Delaware, feeling the city was really our community and excited to have our boat two blocks away. Sailing has done much for our relationship. We tackle most of the necessary fix-it projects together.
For racing, we had a steady crew who became our friends. One of them, David, stuck with us through all the years of racing and distance cruising. Finally, in 2014 we took our dream trip down to Florida and over to the Exumas, Eleuthora, and Abacos, Bahamas, a six-month cruise that we dubbed our Bucket List Sail.
We backed off from Bay races first, and about five years ago, we quietly gave up racing. We recently analyzed the “why” of that decision. We both worried that our judgment on the racecourse would deteriorate. The other factor was racing stress. When we had jobs, racing was a respite from work stress; racing stress was different. We thrived on it until we retired. We no longer experienced that lift from our work week because there was no work week. So, we quit.
We decided to give it a go this year with very different expectations and goals. We have enough trophies. We don’t especially want to race in stormy weather. And our past crew bought their own boats, so our crew looks different as well. We are encouraging people new to sailing to come race with us—different crew nearly every week. The racing and even our race committee assignment have focused more on teaching than competing—although a good race is still a good race.
So far this season, we have invited half a dozen new sailors to join us. We even took out two boys from the local youth sailing program to teach them how to do race committee. It is really fulfilling to watch the new crew members gain skills in sail trimming, the lingo of sailing, anchoring, tactics and strategy, right-of-way, all while enjoying the camaraderie that being together on a boat brings.
Decades pass by swiftly. Our interests evolve, but we remain passionate about this part of our lives and equally grateful that we are still having fun on Summer Semester.
Find more racing articles here and more cruising articles here.
